I had a lot of attention growing up being the baby and all, but my main source of affection came from my Dad.My mom began studying for her Bachelor’s degree when I was 2 so I spent most of my free time watching WWF and eating Doritos with my Dad for nearly a decade.After a few hours of intense conversation he ultimately decided that this relationship was not for him.He had real questions; What kind of support will we have? What is everyone else thinking when they see us walking down the street?I left Aaron alone for a while both because I wasn’t sure what else to say and because if it were me, I would have wanted time and space.About two weeks later I asked him to come over and talk.There are a lot of “Daddy’s Girls” out there, but I am not one of them.
My mom hated seafood so we would often go get fish together and make fun of people at work, school, etc. I always made sure everyone felt welcome and included.
My brother stepped up and tried to be my pseudo Dad by doing things like fixing my broken faucet and expressing his discontent being the executor of the will now that my name was removed. I think she feels like my Dad’s intent was to protect me from a bad situation, but also acknowledged that Aaron was a good guy and I was an adult capable of making my own decisions. They were surprised by both my Dad and Aaron’s reaction.
The reactions of my black friends and coworkers were the most interesting.
He had every right to be sad, angry, pissed off, frustrated, or just instantly “over it”.
The conversation quickly fizzled and I walked away knowing my pain was now his too and there was nothing I could do to fix it.